(no subject)

[meapet]

Ever have one of those days when you just want to be held for hours, to make everything just dissapear?

Comments

Re: YES!

[meapet.livejournal.com]

Sounds so familiar.. Do you also say you dont want anyone to care cause you don't want to lose them as friends because you think you're really psycho and everyone else has left you when you've been like this?
Hence hwy I feel like I need to get over myself.

Re: YES!

[karithebootgirl.livejournal.com]

to an extent, yes. I'm very afraid that if I let loose and someone sees how I really am sometimes (whether it's bitchy or depressed or lonely) that I'll scare them off.

I know, for me, I'm usually only like this when pms is bad.. and luckily, it's not like this all the time..

but it is frightening. I have lost someone I loved because of my pms moodiness. I don't want to let that happen again. I try to work very hard to control my emotions rather than let them control me. And times like this, that's way easier said than done

*hug*

Re: YES!

[meapet.livejournal.com]

Mine isn't PMS, its just depression right now.. But I'm so hard headed that it makes people mad.. I've lost so many friends because they think I'm psycho.. and just when I've gotten close to them.. so now I dont really trust anyone. Whats the point if they're going to just fuck you over.

*hugs back*

Re: YES!

[karithebootgirl.livejournal.com]

for me, it's been a long journey of loving myself. and when i'm feeling low, it's the hardest thing in the world to do. i still don't always do it well.. but I keep reminding myself I don't have to be perfect.. I just have to do my best and let that be good enough.

thanks for the hugs :)

Re: YES!

[meapet.livejournal.com]

Yeah.. my therapist is trying to get me into that whole lovingmyself thing.. we'll see what comes of it. Right now its a struggle to even look at myself in a mirror without saying, "i hate you."

Re: YES!

[karithebootgirl.livejournal.com]

the first step for me was to pick out the parts of me that I liked... and the parts of me that I hated. Over the last 10 years, I've managed to work through and either change or accept most of the parts that I hated. I hated the little girl in me that was so needy, insecure and afraid all the time. She was the last big thing I worked on. Last fall. I made a sort of altar to her. Pictures of me as a child, things I'd loved as a child, toys my child loved. Then I put questions she asked... and my adult's loving answers to them. Answers that I'd give to a child I loved. It took me a while to do all that.. and a while to accept her... but it was so worth the work. I'll never be perfect.. it's not even a goal. But I do love myself. I'm very careful to say "I hate when I feel like this" instead of "I hate me when I'm like this" There's a big difference.

Something else I learned.. no one can truely love me if I don't love myself first. Why would they want to? I have to value and cherish myself in order for others to see me as valuable and lovable, right? I know, easier said than done.

I wish you the very best :)