The General Blahs
Mar. 18th, 2002 02:52 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
really feeling those blahs today. Waiting for Carter to get here to fill out the paperwork for the apartment, but not even sure if we're gonna get it. Scared that we wont, and I'll have to move back to Frederick. It just doesn't seem like anything's working out. I still don't have a job.. not for lack of trying to find one. It just sucks that there's like a billion people in the tech sector trying to get a job right now.
Then I start to feel bad about not going to college, or not being more corporately inclined. I just don't seem to fit in the Corporate frame of mind. I seem to always do something wrong in these spots. And it makes me feel like a bad person because of it. I don't have couth or something. I don't know. I really just don't know right now.
A lot of people are going to see this and be worried.. Don't be. I'm just really worried about where I'm going to be a week from now, a month from now, etc. Had the drowning dream last night, one I haven't had for awhile..so I've been down all day. I just need something positive on the job/home front to come through so I'm not walking a tightrope without a net.
At least I'm not having an anxiety attack.
Off to put some laundry in and wait for Carter.
Then I start to feel bad about not going to college, or not being more corporately inclined. I just don't seem to fit in the Corporate frame of mind. I seem to always do something wrong in these spots. And it makes me feel like a bad person because of it. I don't have couth or something. I don't know. I really just don't know right now.
A lot of people are going to see this and be worried.. Don't be. I'm just really worried about where I'm going to be a week from now, a month from now, etc. Had the drowning dream last night, one I haven't had for awhile..so I've been down all day. I just need something positive on the job/home front to come through so I'm not walking a tightrope without a net.
At least I'm not having an anxiety attack.
Off to put some laundry in and wait for Carter.